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Self-Care

5 Coping Strategies You Can Use Today

January 22, 2026 Allison Brown, Therapist

When stress hits, having a few go-to coping strategies can make all the difference. These five practical techniques are ones you can start using right now, wherever you are.

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We all face moments when stress, worry, or difficult emotions feel like more than we can handle. The good news is that there are simple, practical strategies you can use right now to help bring yourself back to a calmer, more grounded place. You do not need any special tools or training to get started. Here are five coping strategies our therapists often recommend to clients.

1. Deep Breathing

When anxiety or stress ramps up, your breathing often becomes shallow and rapid, which can make things feel even worse. Deep breathing activates your body's relaxation response and can quickly bring down your stress level. Try this simple exercise: breathe in slowly through your nose for a count of four, hold for a count of four, then exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of six. Repeat this three to five times. You can do this anywhere, at your desk, in your car, or even in the middle of a stressful conversation.

2. Grounding Techniques

Grounding helps you come back to the present moment when anxiety pulls you into worst-case-scenario thinking. One of the most popular grounding exercises is the 5-4-3-2-1 technique: name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This simple exercise redirects your attention from racing thoughts to the world around you.

3. Journaling

Putting your thoughts and feelings on paper can be incredibly powerful. Journaling helps you process what you are experiencing, identify patterns in your thinking, and create distance between yourself and overwhelming emotions. You do not need to write perfectly or for a long time. Even five minutes of free writing at the end of the day can help you release pent-up stress and gain clarity on what is bothering you.

4. Physical Movement

Movement is one of the most effective natural stress relievers available. Exercise releases endorphins, the body's natural mood boosters, and helps burn off the excess adrenaline and cortisol that build up during stressful times. This does not mean you have to go for a long run or hit the gym. A ten-minute walk around the block, some gentle stretching, or even dancing to your favorite song in the kitchen can shift your mood and energy.

5. Social Connection

When we are struggling, our instinct is often to withdraw and isolate ourselves. However, connection with others is one of our most fundamental needs and one of the strongest protectors of mental health. Reaching out to a trusted friend, family member, or even a support group can remind you that you are not alone. The conversation does not need to be about your problems. Sometimes simply spending time with someone who cares about you is enough to lighten the load.

These strategies work best when practiced regularly, not just during a crisis. Think of them as part of your everyday wellness toolkit. If you find that stress or anxiety continues to feel unmanageable even with these techniques, that is a good sign that professional support could help. Our team at Paula S. Gordy LISW, LLC is here for you. Call (641) 856-2688 to schedule an appointment.

Compassionate therapist welcoming a new client
Getting Started

What to Expect at Your First Therapy Appointment

January 10, 2026 Paula S. Gordy, LISW

Starting therapy can feel intimidating, but knowing what to expect can ease a lot of that uncertainty. Here is a friendly walkthrough of what your first session actually looks like.

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Making the decision to start therapy is a brave step, and it is completely normal to feel a mix of hope and nervousness about your first appointment. Many of our clients tell us that the anticipation was actually worse than the session itself. Our goal is to make you feel as comfortable and welcomed as possible from the moment you walk through our door.

Before You Arrive: Paperwork and Preparation

Before your first session, you will have the opportunity to complete intake paperwork either through our secure client portal or in person when you arrive. These forms ask about your personal background, current concerns, medical history, and what you hope to get out of therapy. Completing them in advance means you can use your full session time getting to know your therapist. We recommend arriving about 15 minutes early if you still need to finish paperwork at the office.

Meeting Your Therapist

Your therapist will greet you and bring you to a private, comfortable therapy room. The first session is largely about building a connection. Your therapist wants to get to know you as a person, not just your symptoms. Expect a warm, conversational tone. There is no couch you have to lie on, no pressure to share anything you are not ready to discuss, and no judgment about what you do share.

The Initial Assessment

During this first visit, your therapist will ask questions about what brought you to therapy, your current daily life, your relationships, your mental and physical health history, and what you would like to work on. This is called an assessment, and it helps your therapist understand the full picture so they can recommend the best approach for you. You are welcome to ask questions too. Therapy is a two-way conversation, and finding the right fit matters.

Setting Goals Together

Toward the end of your first session, you and your therapist will begin to identify goals for treatment. These goals are yours. They might be broad, like wanting to feel less anxious, or specific, like improving communication with a partner. Your therapist will work collaboratively with you to develop a treatment plan that reflects your unique needs, and this plan can always be adjusted as you progress.

What NOT to Worry About

You do not need to have your thoughts perfectly organized or know exactly what to say. You do not need to cry, share your entire life story, or have a breakthrough in the first session. There is no right or wrong way to do therapy. The first session is simply the beginning of a relationship built on trust, and that takes time. Our therapists meet you exactly where you are.

If you have been thinking about starting therapy but feel unsure, we encourage you to take that first step. Our friendly team is happy to answer any questions before you schedule. Call us at (641) 856-2688 or visit our Client Resources page for more information about getting started.

Behavioral health provider working with a child through play therapy
BHIS

The Benefits of BHIS Services for Iowa Families

December 15, 2025 Morgan Boney, BHIS Provider

Behavioral Health Intervention Services bring mental health support directly into the community. Learn what BHIS is, who qualifies, and how it can make a real difference for Iowa families.

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Not everyone can easily make it to a therapy office for regular appointments. Transportation challenges, school schedules, work conflicts, and the stigma that can come with walking into a mental health clinic can all stand in the way of getting help. That is where Behavioral Health Intervention Services, known as BHIS, come in. BHIS is a program available through Iowa Medicaid that takes mental health support out of the office and into the community, meeting people right where they are.

What Is BHIS?

BHIS stands for Behavioral Health Intervention Services. It is a community-based mental health program designed to help individuals, particularly children and adolescents, develop the skills they need to manage mental health symptoms and improve their daily functioning. Unlike traditional therapy, which takes place in an office setting, BHIS services are delivered in the environments where clients live their daily lives: at home, at school, in the community, or wherever they feel most comfortable. BHIS providers work one-on-one with clients to teach and practice coping skills, emotional regulation, social skills, and other strategies that make a real-world difference.

Who Qualifies for BHIS?

BHIS services are available to individuals who are enrolled in Iowa Medicaid and who have a qualifying mental health diagnosis. The program is most commonly used by children and adolescents, but it can be available for adults as well depending on individual circumstances. A referral and a mental health assessment are typically part of the process to determine eligibility. Our team can help you navigate the qualification process and determine if BHIS is a good fit for you or your family member.

How BHIS Works in the Community

A BHIS provider meets with the client regularly, often on a weekly basis, in a setting that works for the client and their family. Sessions are skill-focused and goal-oriented. For example, a BHIS provider might help a teenager practice calming techniques before a stressful school situation, work with a child on social skills during an after-school activity, or help an individual develop routines and strategies for managing anxiety at home. The beauty of BHIS is that it does not take place in an artificial setting. Skills are learned and practiced in the real-world environments where they will actually be used.

Real Benefits for Families

Families who participate in BHIS often report significant improvements in their child's behavior, emotional regulation, and overall well-being. Parents and caregivers also benefit because BHIS providers can offer guidance and strategies for the whole family, not just the identified client. The in-community model means less disruption to the family's schedule, no transportation barriers, and a more natural, less intimidating experience for the client. For many Iowa families, BHIS has been a turning point in their mental health journey.

Getting Started with BHIS

If you think BHIS might be right for your family, the first step is to contact our office. We can walk you through the eligibility requirements, help you understand what to expect, and connect you with one of our experienced BHIS providers. Paula S. Gordy LISW, LLC has a dedicated team of BHIS professionals serving families across southern Iowa. Call us at (641) 856-2688 or visit our BHIS Services page to learn more.

Support group joining hands together in solidarity
Mental Health Education

Recognizing Depression: More Than Just Feeling Sad

November 28, 2025 Cassidy Stewart, Therapist

Depression is often misunderstood as simply feeling sad. In reality, it shows up in many ways that can be hard to recognize. Learn the signs that go beyond the obvious.

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When most people think of depression, they picture someone who is crying all the time or unable to get out of bed. While those can certainly be part of the experience, depression is far more complex than that. It can be subtle, sneaky, and show up in ways that you might not expect. Understanding the full picture of depression is important because it helps people recognize when they or someone they care about might need support.

Symptoms Beyond Sadness

Depression often manifests as persistent fatigue or a lack of energy that does not improve with rest. You might find that you are more irritable than usual, snapping at loved ones over small things or feeling frustrated by situations that would not normally bother you. Difficulty concentrating, making decisions, or remembering things can be another hallmark, sometimes mistaken for simple distraction or aging. Physical symptoms are also common with depression. Unexplained headaches, digestive problems, chronic pain, and changes in appetite or weight can all be tied to depression. Many people visit their doctor for these physical complaints without ever connecting them to their mental health.

Loss of Interest and Withdrawal

One of the most telling signs of depression is a loss of interest in things you once enjoyed. Hobbies, social activities, time with friends, exercise, or creative pursuits that used to bring pleasure may start to feel pointless or exhausting. This withdrawal can happen gradually, making it hard to notice until you look back and realize how much has changed. You might start declining invitations, spending more time alone, or going through the motions of daily life without feeling engaged or present.

The Difference Between Grief, Sadness, and Clinical Depression

It is important to understand that sadness is a normal, healthy emotion. Grief after a loss, disappointment after a setback, and emotional pain during difficult times are all part of the human experience. These feelings typically come in waves and tend to lessen over time. Clinical depression, on the other hand, is persistent. It lasts for weeks, months, or longer and does not improve on its own. Depression colors your entire experience. It can make everything feel heavy, hopeless, and pointless, even when things in your life are going relatively well. If sadness or low mood has been present most of the day, nearly every day, for two weeks or more, it may be time to talk to a professional.

Treatment Can Help

Depression is one of the most treatable mental health conditions. Therapy, particularly approaches like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, can help you understand the thought patterns that contribute to depression, develop healthier ways of coping, and gradually reclaim a sense of meaning and engagement in your life. For some people, a combination of therapy and medication management through a prescribing provider offers the best results. Our practice can coordinate with your primary care provider to ensure a comprehensive approach to your care.

If you recognize yourself or someone you love in this article, please do not wait. Depression tends to get worse without treatment, but with the right support, recovery is absolutely possible. Reach out to our team at (641) 856-2688. You deserve to feel like yourself again.

Family meeting with a counselor in a warm setting
Relationships

How Couples Counseling Can Strengthen Your Relationship

November 10, 2025 Jacoby Campbell, Therapist

Couples counseling is not just for relationships in crisis. It can be a powerful tool for building stronger communication, deepening connection, and navigating life's challenges together.

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Many people think of couples counseling as a last resort, something you try when the relationship is already on the verge of ending. In reality, couples counseling can be valuable at any stage of a relationship. Think of it like a tune-up for your car. You do not wait until the engine breaks down to bring it in for maintenance. In the same way, working on your relationship proactively can prevent small issues from growing into major problems and can help you build an even stronger foundation together.

When Should Couples Consider Therapy?

There is no wrong time to start couples counseling, but there are some common signs that it might be especially helpful. You might consider it if you and your partner have the same arguments over and over without resolution, if communication has broken down or feels hostile, if trust has been damaged and you want to rebuild it, if you are going through a major life transition like a move, a new baby, or a career change, or if you simply feel disconnected and want to find your way back to each other. You do not have to be in crisis to benefit from couples therapy. Some of the most successful couples we work with come in specifically because they want to strengthen what they already have.

What Happens in Couples Counseling Sessions?

In your first session, your therapist will get to know both of you, your relationship history, your individual perspectives, and what you are hoping to achieve. From there, sessions typically involve guided conversations where both partners have the opportunity to be heard in a safe, structured environment. Your therapist acts as a neutral facilitator, helping you communicate more effectively, understand each other's perspectives, and develop tools for handling disagreements in healthier ways. You may work on specific issues like trust, intimacy, parenting differences, or financial stress, or you may focus on broader goals like improving overall communication and emotional connection.

Common Myths About Couples Counseling

One of the biggest myths is that couples counseling means your relationship is failing. In truth, seeking support is a sign that you care about the relationship and are willing to invest in it. Another common myth is that the therapist will take sides. A good couples therapist is trained to remain neutral and to advocate for the relationship, not for one partner over the other. Some people also worry that they will be forced to share things they are not ready to discuss. Your therapist will respect both partners' boundaries and will never pressure you to disclose more than you are comfortable with.

Building Stronger Communication Skills

At the heart of most relationship challenges is communication. Couples counseling helps you develop skills like active listening, expressing your needs without blame or criticism, managing conflict without escalation, and creating space for vulnerability and emotional intimacy. These are skills that benefit not just your romantic relationship but all of your relationships, with family, friends, coworkers, and beyond. Many couples tell us that what they learn in therapy transforms the way they interact with everyone in their lives.

If you and your partner are interested in exploring couples counseling, we invite you to reach out. Our therapists provide a warm, nonjudgmental space where both partners can feel safe and heard. Call (641) 856-2688 to schedule an appointment, or learn more about our couples counseling services.

Group of happy, smiling children
Children & Families

Supporting Your Child's Mental Health: A Guide for Parents

October 20, 2025 Carla Schippers, Therapist

As a parent, recognizing when your child is struggling can be challenging. This guide covers the signs to watch for, how to start the conversation, and when professional support can help.

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As a parent, there is nothing more important to you than your child's well-being. But when it comes to mental health, the signs that something is wrong are not always obvious. Children and adolescents often express emotional distress differently than adults, and what looks like misbehavior, defiance, or simply a phase may actually be a sign of an underlying mental health concern. Understanding what to look for and knowing how to respond can make a tremendous difference in your child's life.

Recognizing the Signs

Children may not have the language to tell you they are struggling, so they show you through their behavior. Common signs of mental health concerns in children and teens include changes in mood that last more than a couple of weeks, such as persistent sadness, irritability, or anger. Withdrawal from friends, family, or activities they used to enjoy is another important signal. Academic changes, like a sudden drop in grades or difficulty concentrating, can also indicate that something deeper is going on. Watch for changes in eating or sleeping patterns, frequent complaints of headaches or stomachaches without a medical cause, regressive behaviors in younger children (like bedwetting or clinginess), and in older children, increased risk-taking, substance use, or talk of hopelessness or self-harm.

Having Age-Appropriate Conversations

Talking to your child about mental health does not have to be complicated or scary. For younger children, start simple. You might say something like, "Everyone has big feelings sometimes. It is okay to feel sad or scared, and you can always tell me about it." For older children and teenagers, be direct but gentle. Let them know you have noticed some changes and that you are asking because you care, not because they are in trouble. Avoid minimizing their feelings with phrases like "just cheer up" or "everyone goes through this." Instead, validate what they are feeling by saying something like, "That sounds really hard. I am glad you told me." The most important thing is to listen without judgment and to let your child know that asking for help is a sign of strength.

When to Seek Professional Help

It is time to consider professional support if your child's symptoms are persistent, lasting more than two weeks, if they are impacting daily life at home, school, or with friends, if your child expresses thoughts of self-harm or hopelessness, if you have tried to help at home but things are not improving, or if your instincts as a parent tell you something is not right. Trust yourself. You know your child better than anyone, and if something feels off, it is worth exploring with a professional.

How Therapy Works for Children

Therapy for children looks different from therapy for adults. Depending on the child's age, a therapist may use play, art, storytelling, or other creative approaches to help the child express and process their feelings. For older children and teens, talk therapy is often used, but in a way that feels approachable and relevant to their world. Parents and caregivers are often involved in the process, whether through family sessions, regular updates, or learning strategies to support their child at home. Our therapists are experienced in working with young people and are skilled at building trust and rapport with children of all ages.

The Role Parents Play

Your role as a parent is invaluable. Beyond seeking professional help, you can support your child's mental health by creating a home environment where emotions are openly discussed, by maintaining consistent routines, by modeling healthy coping strategies yourself, and by staying connected and involved in their life. Remember that taking care of your own mental health is also part of being a good parent. You cannot pour from an empty cup.

If you are concerned about your child's mental health, please do not hesitate to reach out. Our team has experience working with children, adolescents, and families, and we also offer BHIS services that bring support directly into your home or community. Call (641) 856-2688 to learn more or schedule an appointment.

Stay Connected

We regularly share mental health tips, practice updates, and helpful resources through our blog. Follow along for information that supports your well-being and helps you get the most out of your mental health journey.

For the latest updates, follow our blog or contact our office.

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Disclaimer: The information provided in these blog posts is for educational purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for professional mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of a qualified provider with any questions you may have regarding a mental health condition.